MTA.

in a subway car
we're going downtown express
but we're not moving

One of the largest mass-transit developments of all time has failed us. Regardless of how much fares might increase or the amount of track work done, nothing can fix the aling problems that plague the morning express service from the Bronx into Manhattan.

What has caused my fingers to move a mile a minute on a stalled train? To put it simply -- I am bored out of my fucking mind. I have been on this train since 9:15 am from 167 st in the Bronx. It is now a quarter to ten -- thirty minutes later -- and I am stuck on the express track at 103rd st.

The train announcer has come over the speaker and he tells a sordid tale about signal problems at 86th st. Tragic story, isn't it? It gets better though -- MTA "supervision" is aware of this. The real tragidy in this whole fiasco is Paragon supervision does not give a fuck. In reality, neither do I.

I need to clock in at my job in three minutes. Unless this is a magical train makes its next stop at the timeclock in the hallway, I don't think I will arrive at work until well after half past ten. I hope that there are other motherfuckers that work with me on this train so that I am not the only asshole with a sad tale of why I could not make it to my job when I was supposed to.

But back to those cocksuckers at the MTA!

I want to know 1) Why is there signal problems and what caused them... 2) Why hasn't this train been rerouted onto the local track -- from the sounds of it, it's running fine... 3) What's being done to prevent this from happening in the future... 4) If fares have been raised to better service, why has it gone to shit... and the last, and most important question, If the money didn't go into the train service, did it go into the pockets of the executives who raised the fares instead, and if it did, how can I swipe my metrocard to fuck them in the ass like they fucked me?

There is an automated announcement that periodically advises of train traffic ahead of me and that - should be patient. What would happen if we weren't patient? Suppose... just hypothetically... that the passengers in all cars rioted at the same time. Suppose... again, hypothetically... that the passengers manage to flip the cars onto their sides. Suppose... suppose that we destroyed the express line for the 4 train in such a rebellious way that now they had a good reason for service interruptions.

Oh dear, did I just print that online? That sounds like something that might, oh - I don't know, insight a riot? About fucking time. We sit (or stand) on this train, huddled together like cows to the slaughter, and all they can do is placate us with a bullshit announcement that does nothing. I still lost two dollars on this fateful voyage into the abyss of wasted time I still have to clock in late and miss out on valuable overtime pay. And above all, I will be late! This is the worst because they fire people over being late -- it's a daily thing!

10:00 hours and we have pulled into 86th st. To transfer to the 6 or not transfer to the 6 -- that is the question. Will a train making all local stops get me there sooner or should I stay put here? My job is but three stops away, on the express track, the six, god knows. I decided to stay put and hope for the best. It's usually my luck that leaves me taking the alternate route and the initial problem resolving itself with expediancy once I am removed from the equation. I am the remainder to your division problem, and the MTA is absolved of all wrong.

The joys of corporations running municipal utilities.

Vote YES for deregulation! Oxygen supplies limited, stagger your breaths!