Confusion.

bets were being made
paternity was in doubt
then he dropped the shells

The reading closed with an important thing that I must always remember, "Your head carries your body." While it is true that the head is attached to the body and the body attached to the legs, one could see the body carrying the head, but if it wasn't for the head, the legs wouldn't know where to carry it to. Food for thought.

I had my reading with Ochún today. It was an important reading because we discovered who my guardian angel was. The shells dropped were those of my godfather, Felix the Great. He had wanted me to be a child of Ochún, because he is a child of Ochún. Being potentially his first crown, that would have been something special. I can understand that.

When I went to Cuba, Ifá said that I was a child of Eleggua. From that time, I had a connection with Eleggua, and I had myself excited that when I did santo, I would be crowned with him. After padrino telling me day after day that I was a child of Ochún, I started to think about it. I envisioned myself throwing down as he does -- no longer flat on the ground, but seated, bringing each elbow to the floor. I was ok with being one of her children. I have great respect for padrino, and if I was a child of Ochún, I would want to be like him.

Needless to say, the shells said that I was a child of Obatalá. I am still throwing myself flat to the floor. I was disappointed at first because I thought if it didn't come out Eleggua that it would come out Ochún. I don't know much about Obatalá, and it made me weary. In a way, it is good because now I can learn more about aspects of the religion that I wasn't aware of prior.

Besides the obvious importance of dropping my guardian angel, the reading also came out with some interesting things. Ochún told me that my education had stopped prematurely. I was supposed to continue learning, and by now should have made something of myself. If you think about it, I got out of Ithaca in 2004, Had I continued, it's three years later, and I could have earned a higher degree in that timeframe. I had moved to Florida and everything was disrupted. * Luz *

She also told me that my lack of patience is a problem. I need to learn patience, and I need to learn it quickly. Stop getting angry at myself when things out of my control don't work out. Stop blaming myself and start loving myself. I need to take credit for my accomplishments. Even tho I have some intense moments, she knows that I am not crazy. Instead of doing whatever I want, I need to start to seek advice from elders so that I remain on the correct path.

She said that I am strong headed and I have a lot of anger inside. I should stop and think before I run my mouth. I have a good spirit and want to help people, but I need to stop because people take credit for things I've helped them get in life. I'm smooth -- I can play everyone -- except for Ochún. She knows me inside and out, and it won't work. I have a talent in my hands, and I should use it. Instead of dedicating myself solely to work or solely to love, I need to find a balance between the two to make it work. I should lie only when it will save myself.

Ochún wants me to find a job and to go back to school. I need to establish a written plan for myself and not let people distract me from accomplishing my goals. I need to get a chain around my foot for stability. I have a Palo muerto, and because of this I need to be scratched. With all of that said, Ochún will help me get a job and find stability in my life. When I get on track with my life, in my job and with my education, I should pursue santo.

Your head carries your body... entonce, let's go for a walk...