The Scientist From the North...

ever find someone
so real that it hurts inside
with no solution

We all remember the Scientist from the North -- at least I do. He posts comments under his real name, which I don't mind, because hey, I know who it is, and it's a comment. Of all the boys I've come into contact with, I've yet to see his penis. You're saying to yourself, "So what Chulo, it's just a finger that spits." While I know this, it has significance.

I've always been the one to jump into the sexual aspect of a relationship much sooner than the get to know someone part of the process, however with him, it's much more difficult. Part of the difficulty stems from the fact that he's still in school and the other part, a major part, is he's in Chicago, but an even larger factor is that I feel that there definitely could be something real waiting to happen between us -- something special.

We've spoken on the phone and on the internet via "video conferencing"" and instant messaging. I haven't felt so close to someone so far away in a hot minute. We have similar interests and can communicate over a long period of time as if no time has passed. It's like The Little Bird and I, but while similar, with the Scientist from the North, I actually long to hear his voice or read his thoughts.

We were text messaging a moment ago, and I've yet to receive a response. I know one will come, but I want it now. I want to meet him outside of the Matrix. To smell his scent, feel his lips on my lips... something physical. It could be something as simple and as insignificant as a hug. I feel connected to him, and I think he feels the same way for me judging by the way we correspond with each other.

After he disappeared for almost two months I thought that I might have done something, but before it reached that point of no return he went and done something sweet. A text message to let me know he's thinking about me, a comment on my blog, or even an email asking how my day was. They're always out of the blue, and with no predictability.

I realise that he's busy with school and activism. I know he's got friends and jump-offs over there. But sometimes I just wish that I could have one or two hours of his time. Let me get to know the real Scientist from the North. I want to find out what spots on his body make him hot, but I also want to find out what subjects we can get philosophical with and bang out a heated debate. I want it face to face tho.

He honestly has me thirsty to no extent; I want to find out more, I want to feel the warmth of his touch, el sabor de sus besos. But it's all a dream. I just hope I don't wake up before I can see the end of the story.

"Can you do Addition?" the White Queen asked. "What's one and one and one and one and one and one and one and one and one and one?" "I don't know," said Alice. "I lost count." ~ Through the Looking Glass, Lewis Carroll