Cock Sucker in Disguise...

he came to my door
wearing a mask of concern
devil in disguise

So the Haitians came today to install gutters on the house to prevent the rain from turning the little bit of grass that we do have into a swamp. Sure enough, don't you think that the cock sucking bastard who had the rocks dumped in front of the house was at the front door talking to my the Mother Unit about some bueracratic bullshit. The Mother Unit had no idea who the jew bastard was -- he's like, oh I'm on the board -- she's like what's ya name.

Neal... or as he's known hence-forth... Janus

That's when she remembered... he's the motherfucker that had the rocks deposited in the yard, he's the motherfucker who doesn't return phone calls... he's the motherfucker that told the Haitians that he was going to fine us because we didn't seek the association's permission. Janus then began to cross examine the Mother Unit at the front door asking her twenty questions about the minor home inprovement operation. Did we have permits from the village, did we get permission from the association, did we do this, did we do that... as if he was a government official on some bullshit IRS tax-evasion sting op. His elected position only means one thing -- that his Jew eyes can be in everyone's business whenever the son of a bitch gets bored with his mundane life and feels like harassing the good folk who don't drive a BMW and worship a Pagan religion.

Regardless, I made my way to investigate who the Mother Unit was talking to. I found her speaking to some random guy -- all I knew was there were supposed to be random guys there because it was their job to put up the gutters. But the more I listened to his poisoned words, the stronger my suspicions that he did not belong became. I began to ask questions about the permit situation and he began to spout some dogmatic bullshit about association rules and blah blah blah. So quid pro quo I said, "Well it's mighty good that we have to care about what the association has to say when we want to do something, but when it comes to what they want to do there's no involvement. Look at these ugly rocks in front of the house, what kind of shit is that? We're not even in the gate -- I bet the association would love if we stopped paying dues. It's not like we're getting any benefits from them. What can they do if we withhold payment anyways?".

Well that was the wrong question -- in short, they can foreclose on the house. Who knew? But one thing is for certain, my outburst made him nervous enough to get back into his vehicle to go harass some other home improver. I really need to get his job so that I can make his life as monitored as mine. I'll park my car outside his house and stand watch, waiting for him to slip up. As if he's so perfect, he's on the board, he can do as he pleases. Mama guevaso!

I've got you in my sights little man...